As we settle in on the New Year, it’s time to really think about the changes we want to make this year. I hear people talk incessantly about resolutions, beginnings, weight loss and kicking bad habits, making more money, a new exercise regimen, making amends with those we have wronged, etc.
I hear it all, all the things we want to do that we didn’t accomplish in 2015. You know, kind of like a tally of all the wrongs and screw-ups and mistakes and blunders.
Your very own personalized self-deprecation report card where you can be the Simon Cowell of your own character.
Anyone who knows me knows that I have a real issue with endings. In fact, I quote Shel Silverstein so often, you’d think he was a member of my immediate family.
“There are no happy endings.
Endings are the saddest part.
So just give me a happy middle
And a very happy start.”
So for me, if you combine the ending of one year and sprinkle that sundae with all the things I need to work on — you might as well wrap me in a blanket and put me to bed because it is very depressing.
I usually cry every year when the clock strikes 12. No matter whom I’m with, what I’m doing or how happy I am — I still tend to cry.
I cry because I’m nostalgic, superstitious and, of course, reflective. I am not crying because I am so disappointed with myself.
I cry because when the New Year rings in, I realize more than ever how Father Time never stops for anyone or anything. And for that brief moment when the countdown begins, I become more conscious than ever of just one thing.
How time has aged my parents, my children, me, my friends, the people I love.
I cry because I want just one thing each year — for the people I love so deeply and dearly to just stay healthy and safe.
I am able to say each year, wholeheartedly, that those I love know they are loved — always. I never get off the phone without telling them, “I love you.”
I have a new way of looking at the New Year. I think we should reflect back at 2015 and see all the things that we did that were actually right — the things that we are proud of, the progress that we’ve made, the friendships that we have maintained, the accomplishments of our children, our new relationships that have grown and thrived, how we’ve shown our love to the ones we love.
The things we did that mattered.
We are all so critical of ourselves — brutally. We look for validation constantly from others when it really needs to come from within.
We all know where we could do better on many things — the little voice that whispers in our ear when we are doing something wrong. We hear it and we know it. Ignoring it doesn’t stop it from talking to us.
We just justify it.
How about this year, instead of resolutions to do better, we set out with the intention to love … others and ourselves just exactly for who we are.
After all, anyone can love a rose — but it takes a huge heart to include the thorns.
Until Next Week,