Is he a "strayer" or a "stayer"?

Is he a "strayer" or a "stayer"?

I think one of the biggest complaints I’ve heard in regard to relationships is that people tend to stop listening to their partners’ needs after a certain amount of time.

 

Big issue.

 

I’ve witnessed so many people unnecessarily get divorced based on one fact and one fact only…

 

They just tune their partners out.

 

It’s really important to listen because most of the time what’s being said has more relevance than we realize.

 

Over and over again I hear the same thing — partners who aren’t listening to the needs and wants of their special someone.

 

I hear men tell me how much the woman their life nags or women breaking down in tears over the fact that they are never heard by their husbands or boyfriends.

 

Perpetual unhappiness seems to be everywhere, and I feel like divorce becomes imminent when this happens.

 

My parents have been married for 58 years, and I feel like that generation worked through their issues. They stayed and worked things out.

 

Things are so different nowadays. Getting over the hump now refers to getting past Wednesday, not overcoming relationship obstacles.

 

I feel like couples get into this rut or what I like to call the special dance’ only known to them.

 

Maybe they are accustomed after a certain amount of time to tuning out what they deem as complaints rather than actively listening to what their partner is trying to tell them.

 

Not sure.

 

But I like to point out that what is being said is often significant and needs to be taken seriously.

 

Lately I’ve been bombarded with the sex issue in relationships where two people are completely out of alignment — one wants it more than the other or not at all.

 

This is a huge problem and often sends the “hankering partner” on a mission to stray.

 

It’s sad. They don’t want to leave, but they are completely unfulfilled because their partner will not listen to their needs or wants.

 

I feel like people stop actively trying — especially after being together for years — and we all know that affection and intimacy is the foundation of most relationships.

 

It’s wise to listen. It’s even smarter to compromise so that both people are satisfied with the arrangement.

 

We all have the choice to either “stay” or “stray.”

 

Given today’s constant stream of digital opportunities, as well as living in a generation of entitlement — when not receiving what is wanted is immediately sought out — we’ve got to try just a little bit harder.

 

Don’t you think?

 

While we can’t control what other people do, we can control what goes on behind our closed doors, under our tents with our own circus.

 

Some people are just natural born “strayers,” and no matter how good it is at home, they will wander. But others are desperately seeking something at home that they are lacking, and actively look for it when their frustration peaks.

 

So today’s advice: Listen up, hear what’s being said, and try to never stop dating your wife/girlfriend or flirting with your husband/boyfriend.

 

In the end…just be happy.

 

Until Next time,

 

Love,

Karin

 

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