Happy Birthday, Buddha Barbie…
Tomorrow marks the one-year birth of my blog. Without tooting my own horn or boring you ad nauseam, I’d like to celebrate the first 365 days of Buddha Barbie’s life by telling you how far it’s come.
It’s been an incredible year for my little start-up blog that has had, so far, over 125k people read my posts, in over 25 different countries…only in its infancy stage. What started out as a platform for my own morals and ethical views, has turned into a self-help relationship/advice forum that has helped guide so many people in their daily lives.
Who would’ve thunk it, right?
As a woman who’s experienced true love, the loss of love and a case of very serious heartbreak, my mission was to help others overcome their own romantic and daily obstacles, as well as providing views on everyday subjects that we all tend to face.
The blog didn’t necessarily start out as a relationship medium, but I do talk about relationships a lot because I’m so fascinated by them. I’ve witnessed the failure of so many around me…including my own. I just wanted to learn, for even my own sake, what it takes to make them successful.
Another interesting discovery I’ve made since beginning my blog is that people are really just batshit crazy – everyone. seriously. no joke. Not just the crazy girl down the street or the recently-divorced eye-roving dad or even the neurotic mom that monitors every ingredient that goes into her child’s mouth, but every single person has their own bag of crazy.
It’s sort of scary.
I always say if you can find friends and partners whose crazy can play nicely with your crazy…then you’ve hit the jackpot.
I began my blog after an incredibly devastating break-up left me questioning every view I had on life. When every bone in your body tells you something is right, yet it turns out to be possibly wrong, you begin to reevaluate your own judgment and beliefs, along with your own personal decision-making skills. What I’ve learned through my own journey is that the heart wants what the heart wants – plain and simple. It defies all reason and rationale. I guess we just can’t help who we fall in love with. Good, bad, or indifferent. It doesn’t matter what the gossipmongers say or what the red signs alert us to; our hearts tell us differently and it’s virtually impossible to stop yourself. Love simply clouds our reason and judgment.
It really does.
I married with my head years ago, and while it didn’t go the full distance, it went far enough to produce three of the most wonderful children/blessings from that union. I’ll never regret that for a minute. I was very young and I don’t think I really knew what true love was yet.
As women mature, their need for love and passion on a deeper level becomes more important to them and more significant to their well-being. We just need a more profound connection, and we often require it on a different level as time goes on. We start to look at life and question what is really important. And if our partners don’t give us that deeper level…well, we start to wilt away and become just a shell whose spirit is indifferent.
There’s nothing more stunning than seeing a woman who’s loved in the way she needs. It doesn’t matter what her exterior looks like, you can just see the light coming from within her. She glows. She’s happy. She radiates.
The marriages/relationships that seem to work are the ones where neither partner is taken for granted and each one MEETS most of the other partner’s needs.
I like to call this the 80/20 ratio. Most couples are able to get 80 percent of what they need from their partners. Sometimes they go searching for a new partner that has the 20 percent that they don’t have – and wind up at a deficit of 60 percent.
That’s when bad decisions really come to bite you.
After I got divorced, I decided I would choose my next partner solely from my heart. I had gone the route of choosing with my head, and now I was determined to try another path. This choice led me to a relationship where I experienced deeper love than I ever thought was possible.
This is where the quote, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all” really came to mind.
The problem with loving with your heart as opposed to your head is that if it doesn’t work out — it’s a total TKO. You’re knocked down on the ground with the referee counting above you…”One, two, three!” Eventually you have to get up, and you do - but that kind of break-up leaves a permanent scar.
So what is the answer? Do you choose with your head or heart? I’ve experienced them both, and each one was meaningful in its own way. But if you were to ask me on any given day which one I’d prefer—I’d choose my heart every time.
I’ve learned a lot from every relationship I’ve ever had. More importantly, I learned a great deal about myself and I write about it. I might not tell you exactly where each insight originated from, but you probably already know that when I write about something in particular, somehow I have already experienced it and lived through it.
Buddha Barbie is about my own views on life. I’m a very spiritual girl living inside a woman that loves the beautiful side of life. I make no apologies for who I am, and I try to empower others to find their own voices.
In the year that my blog has been alive, this is what it has accomplished:
* Over 200 e-mails a month asking every question you could ever imagine.
Here’s the answer to my most frequently-asked question:
“No, I don’t talk about my dating life. It’s very private and will remain that way.”
* Within the first three months of its conception, a casting agent from LA requested head shots for a very coveted spot on a talk show.
* A possible radio host spot that’s in the works.
* Thousands of readers a week.
* Many newspaper interviews.
* Several radio interviews.
* An affiliate program with “Buddha Tea.”
And hopefully much more to come as Buddha Barbie steps into its next phase of e-coaching.
In the meantime, I’m sitting tight, waiting to see what direction it will go in and concentrating more on my oldest daughter’s graduation from high school.
Finally, I want to thank all the many people (The Buddha Team) that helped me launch this and provided assistance in every area, whether it was helping to create the Web site, to editing, to running my social media, to teaching me the ins and outs, to taking pictures, or simply drinking wine with me and coming up with blog ideas, et cetera.
I want to thank all my readers for continuing to read this baby blog and following me. I’m honored and humbled by your readership, and I hope to continue to not disappoint you as the blog steps into its toddler years.
Until Next week…
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The Buddha Team