My relationship consulting business has really been taking off, and it’s been amazing.
I don’t advertise other than writing my blogs and posting on social media. But today I am writing to let readers know they can email me for an appointment anytime @ [email protected].
People seem to be reaching out in hopes of finding a little direction to everyday relationship/dating questions.
(Which, BTW, I am more than happy to provide —seeing that I have definitely had had my own unique journey to finding permanent love.)
Did I say unique?
Ok, maybe more like enlightening.
Along with undergraduate degrees, I have relationship-coaching certification, experience
Here’s the thing that I’ve learned, and I mean in a firsthand, right-in-your-face kind of way:
My gut is my best friend.
Having been married at such an early age, I really missed the formative years of dating and getting to know myself —my needs, my wants, and what morals and values were most important to me.
While I thought I knew myself back then, I really never listened to what that little voice in my head was actually saying.
And truth be told, that voice had a lot to say. Sometimes she whispered and others times she yelled, but one thing for sure …
I didn’t always listen.
And I think the most important thing I’ve learned through the years is that your inner voice never lies.
Some call it intuition, others call it a feeling and many even call it their conscience. (Although I’m not quite sure everyone has one —just sayin’.)
I like to call it my sharpest instinct, my best friend, and the inner guide who watches out for me day in and day out.
Of course I have gone years without listening to it, but hasn’t everyone? I mean, even though that girl was talking up a storm, I turned a deaf ear on more than one occasion.
But honestly, my inner voice has predicted almost every betrayal and hardship in my life.
She knew it all.
And here’s the thing …
We are programmed off the bat to question our negative thoughts. Raised to mistrust ourselves, doubt our sanity, our reality —because we’re so afraid to be called crazy.
(Side note: While most men think most women are kind of crazy, the truth is a lot of times it’s some guy out there who has made us this way.)
Every quote we hear says to stay positive, be cheerful, keep looking on the bright side, yada yada yada …
Well, guess what? Sometimes that inner voice is alerting us to danger and letting us know that something ain’t kosher in La La Land.
These are the times when we don’t need to doubt ourselves, we need to honor our truth —and quite possibly run like hell.
I mean, really fast.
I’ve come to know myself well enough that when my gut tells me something is wrong, then I believe myself 100 percent without question.
Getting in touch and aligning with our inner self actually improves all relationships around us and helps us make better decisions in life.
We learn what we want, what we don’t, what makes us feel safe and secure —and what makes us slide down the emotional slippery stairwell all the way to the very bottom.
They say that most humans have between 50 and 60 thousand thoughts a day.
Even more significant is the fact that 80 percent of those thoughts are negative and 95 percent are repetitive. So already we have a built-in Eeyore. (That’s a Winnie the Pooh reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.)
The practice comes in listening to ourselves in a quiet place for at least 10 minutes a day. The thoughts that are most important will come up and need tending to.
I like to point out that when our thoughts turn into a physical response —stomachache, racing heart, nervousness —that is when we must listen to them.
Not just simply hear them.
On a side note, medical attention might be needed if our responses cannot be handled, and that is when it’s time to see your physician.
As we start to listen to our gut (not just the rumblings of hunger), making better decisions that are in our best interests start to come easier.
A SAMple of love is about honoring our truth and respecting it.
As my father always said, “Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your inner voice.”
In other words, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.
Until next time …