As the end of 2014 is growing rapidly closer and 2015 is literally just a day away, I can’t help but take part in some heavy self-reflection based on my last 365 days.
I like to challenge myself each year by asking what it was that I accomplished that actually worked, failed, or could have been improved upon. I think of this as my very own customized report card, only I’m critiquing myself. Believe me, I’m a lenient teacher. Well, sorta. Maybe not.
I believe we all could benefit from a little self-refection when a new year is about to begin, don’t ya think? I feel we need to take the time to evaluate how we treated the people we loved, how we behaved towards the people we let down, and how we reacted to those that failed us.
It’s a good idea to assess what we really want to accomplish for the following year and then exactly what necessary steps are needed to attain that. Sounds complicated, but it’s not.
We should also use those very steps in order to change the things that we really don’t want in our lives.
Blah, blah, blah. It’s the same stuff you hear all the time, but honestly, it really works.
I like to think of this as wiping the slate clean, starting a new beginning, a fresh year…an emotional cleansing. It’s kind of cathartic. It’s a time to write out your goals, with the intention of achieving them. Well, some of them. Maybe one of them. Something. Okay, just try.
New Year’s Eve happens to make me cry every single year since I was a little girl. Nope, it’s not the self-refection that does it. It’s the fact that another year has gone by, and I lack complete coping skills when it comes to endings…all endings. No matter how ‘Buddha like’ I am, I just can’t seem to really and truly embrace them. (That doesn’t include movies that are way too long or conversations that I’m trapped in, by the way.)
No matter where I am in my life, I still weep on New Year’s Eve when the clock strikes midnight. While I look forward to new beginnings and starting anew, I can’t help but always feel a little sad when things come to an end. I’m terrible at endings. In fact, quite honestly, I read the last sentence of every book or magazine just because I want to know how it ends.
As the end of the year is approaching, it’s still bittersweet because I know that the following year is still an unknown. Those that I love are going to be one year older. When it comes to children, that’s okay. When it comes to parents already up there in age, it’s scary. My children will be one year closer to leaving home. The whole New Year ‘thing’ scares me because I just don’t know what will happen. Ughhh. I really should stop thinking so much. It’s these kind of thoughts that make me sob. Actually, I think I might be tearing up just writing about it.
Then when you mix a little alcohol, combined with the whole Auld Lang Syne song…forget about it. Mascara is down to my chin, my nose is red, and tears are literally flowing out of me like a fountain at the Bellagio.
I always close my eyes at that exact moment and wish for great health, happiness, and love for those that I love and adore, and I ask God for another good year in keeping my family and friends healthy, joyful and safe.
In the end, that’s what truly matters.
So enjoy this New Year, be safe, look forward to a new beginning, and live life with meaning and depth.
As Robert Burns wrote in 1778:
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And auld lang syne
For auld lang syne, my dear
For auld lang syne
We’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet
For auld lang syne
And surely ye’ll be your pint stowp
And surely I’ll be mine
And we’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet
For auld lang syne
For auld lang syne, my dear
For auld lang syne
We’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet
For auld lang syne
We twa hae run about the braes
An pou’d the gowans fine
But we’ve wander’d mony a weary fitt
Sin’ auld lang syne
For auld lang syne, my dear
For auld lang syne
We’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet
For auld lang syne
We twa hae paidl’d in the burn
Frae morning sun till dine.
Happy New Year to my three incredible children who are the truest joys of my life. I love you to the moon and back, infinity times infinity plus one.
And, to all, a happy and healthy 2015.
Love,
Karin
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The Buddha Team