Dear Divorced Dads on Mother's Day...

Dear Divorced Dads on Mother's Day...

Dear Divorced Dads,

I have heard through the years, ad nauseum, how angry you are with your ex-wives and how they don’t deserve a Mother’s Day gift — much less any gift, for that matter.

I know you are angry. I know that you are jaded. I know all the reasons….

But hear me out for a moment.

With Mother’s Day quickly approaching, I want to say a few things to you.

First and foremost, if you have children that are not able to drive and get their own Mother’s Day gift, encourage them to make a card or color a picture or make a project to honor their mother.

It’s the right thing.

Remind them of what this day means. If you can muster up the strength, take them to pick something out for their mother. It doesn’t have to cost very much.

After all, it’s not the price you are teaching — it’s the principle. It’s the act of kindness and respect.

On this day, being a parent outweighs being an ex-spouse. On this day, you’re teaching your children to honor their mother. On this day, there is no room for your hatred or anger. Mother’s Day is not about your divorce or the demise of your relationship.

It simply isn’t. 

This day is about one thing and one thing only, and that is honoring mothers for their sacrifice, unselfish love and contribution to the lives of their children through THEIR eyes.

Not yours.

There are many facets to raising children, and unfortunately children do oftentimes suffer the collateral damage of a divorce.

As a mother, the daily struggles, sacrifices and effort that most of us endure do deserve some sort of recognition one day a year.

Whether we are married, divorced, separated, or single.

Many times that recognition is left to the divorced dad/children’s father who has young children and must overcome his own bitterness to do the right thing by making sure his kids recognize the holiday.

My suggestion — take the high road, show respect to the mother of your children. You can never go wrong by teaching your children to celebrate, respect, honor and cherish their mother.

They will thank you for it when they grow up, and they will remember, when they are adults, the valuable lesson that was shown to them by you.

Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers, near and far.


Until Next Week,




2 Responses

    What if the mother is manipulative and hostile, the child is now an adult and wants nothing to do with the mother and the parents are separate living far apart? Any sort of contact is probably just going to rub a sore spot. I’m sorry our child doesn’t want anything to do with you. Happy Mother’s Day?

      That would definitely be a different situation and a gift would not be called for in a hostile situation such as you’ve just described. I’m so sorry you have had to deal with this.

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