I’m Karin and I’m BuddhaBarbie.
BuddhaBarbie came alive over a year ago when I finally realized that for most of my life I’ve had two opposing traits that make up who I am. Instead of choosing either one, (I assure you it’s not like it was Sophie’s choice) I let them both co-exist within my 5’1 frame. After all, even in Haifa the Israelis and Palestinians can live together. Why couldn’t my two different personalities? For the most part they’ve lived quite amicably under one blonde roof. I’ve been told throughout my life that I resemble a Barbie, yet below the surface, lies a very deep and spiritually grounded woman with a wealth of information to share. I’m a single mom to three incredible children and a shih tzu that I’m beyond blessed to have.
As the daughter of a Holocaust survivor (often referred to as 2G…second generation) it’s wise to note that I have inherited a unique set of DNA from my father that has given me exceptional resilience and strength. However, resilience is not the only thing we 2G’s have been passed down. There’s a whole mixed bag of qualities that we inherit as well. Some are great and some just make us incredibly cray cray. We’ll delve into that another day.
This resilience has given me an inner strength that I use as my everyday compass to navigate me through this thing I call “life”. This resilience seems to kick in when I least expect it, kind of like in a video game when your man is down and all of a sudden you get a power ball. Well, that’s how my resilience seems to work. I’m usually is some sort of major crisis and all of a sudden when I think I’m down for the count, I get this surge of strength…and boom I’m on my feet again stronger and wiser than before.
I’m a twice-published popular children’s book author who has loved writing for children for years and visited over 100 schools to read to them. Recently in an interview, I was asked why I chose children as my genre. My reply was simple… because with kids there’s always hope along with little judgment… Prior to that, I was a corporate and freelance speechwriter for fifteen years. I’ve started and stopped a blog several times through the last few years to the dismay of my web guy who put so much time into preparing one for me many years back. Maybe my blog ambivalence stemmed from fear of failure, or perhaps sharing my inner feelings with complete strangers has never been my strong suit. Either way… I’m 150 pages into my third book, an adult self-help (we all need help don’t ya think?) and a literary agent flat out told me that I needed to blog and develop a platform before any publisher will publish it. So here it is…voila…the start of what I intend to be something great…fingers crossed, red ribbon on.
For the last six months I’ve been taking an online course to become a grief/break up coach. Yes, you heard me correctly. Oh, c’mon… I have definitely had enough on the job training!!! (That’s for another day too) Have you ever heard of a break-up coach? I had not. In fact, while getting highlights many months ago, (you knew I wasn’t a natural blonde right?) I stumbled upon an article on how Katy Perry hired a break up coach to get her through her divorce with Russell Brand. I couldn’t understand this concept. It seemed interesting though. How was this different from going to a therapist? I didn’t have the answers but I’d find them. What I found out through research was that a coach is not a licensed therapist and does not need a degree in social work in order to help you. Are you thinking quack yet? I am. Ok, was this going to be like pouring out your woes to the local bartender over a tear-laden vodka on the rocks? No, not exactly. A break up coach shows you how to master something, (not bate) whether it be reaching an important goal (think of yourself as Rocky and the coach is Mick…G-d did I just age myself?) or making a difficult change. Yes, change…my favorite word…NOT. They help you select your goal, engage with it, progress through it, achieve it and integrate the accomplishment into your life. (Then it all goes to shit when you drunken sext him at midnight.)
They are not delving into why daddy didn’t spend enough time with you, or why mommy gave you less allowance than your brother. They also don’t typically deal with clinical disorders such as anxiety, depression etc. (well there goes half the treatable population). They simply offer you a homeopathic remedy to your break up/divorce and loss of love. They are on the sidelines shouting, “don’t call him”, “ don’t text him, etc”…while systematically taking you through a process to get you over your heartache.
It took time to really figure out what my blog would offer and how it would be different than everything else out there. Here it is… this blog will devote my time and my intention to strengthening, motivating and inspiring all who I’m lucky enough to have read it. It’s a self-help blog with an objective on education, experience, spirituality and of course frivolity…
Basically, this blog will share my perspective on various subjects and alluring aspects regarding life. Sometimes you will be amazed at the depth of my words and other times you’ll be laughing at my superficiality (or I suppose nauseated). My mission is that my words help you through your difficult times by reading about my own challenges, experiences and perspectives and having you use these as tools to help cope with your own life. At the very minimum, if I can shed light or laughter on to you, my goal has been completed.
It is important to show in this blog that a person shouldn’t be labeled, defined or put into one type of category or stereotype in life and that it’s all right to be hot, self-driven and spiritually aware all at the same time. Human beings are complicated creatures and made up of so many various traits. The point is to embrace who we are and celebrate it.
If you should decide you don’t like it, feel free to let me know but I should warn you that I would probably spend the next week afterwards weeping to my mother and sisters about it. (Just kidding…I’m tough skinned…seriously don’t worry…I’m a survivor’s kid remember?)
Besides being a break up coach, here come more of my qualifications (this is where I toot my own horn). I have a BA in Sociology, a minor in Psychology. I have gone through and completed Kabbalah twice, studied a Coach Course at the Grief Academy, been divorced, married, almost engaged, and in long-term relationships where there was deep and unwavering love. I have visited many schools as an author and given many lectures on how to self-publish and write. I’ve been in therapy for eight years (thank G-d) and visited numerous mystical spiritualists that include: astrologers, psychics, intuitives, healers etc. (although I don’t know, maybe that makes me a whack job?) I also have had a wide variety of life experiences (both good and bad) that have molded me into the woman I am today. While many of you thought I was just shopping for my Loubies…I’ve read and studied the books and lectures of motivational speakers such as Dr. Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Esther and Jerry Hicks, Iyania Vanzant, Eckhart Tolle, and of course The Dalai Lama.
I walk through life (in beautiful shoes I might add) pretty much thinking most people are certifiably insane. I mean it. Not trying to insult anyone and by no means am I an expert… but jeeze. I silently sit and just shake my head in disbelief at the decisions people make for themselves. I try not to judge with my “altruistic self”, but c’mon sometimes I need to roll in the mud with the best of ‘em… What I’ve learned though, is that every decision that an individual makes is simply based on his or her own ego and insecurities. I’ve realized that another person’s decision is NOT a reflection of you; but is actually a reflection of THEM. I’ve also learned that the more secure and at peace one is with themselves, the happier and better they will be to you and the happier they will be for you.
It’s important to ask yourself often if you’re happy.
I like to think of this as emotional temperature check.
It is very important to find out what makes you happy. This is what I refer to as “self-love”. No one can make you happy or love you until you know how to love yourself and make yourself happy. While I know this connotation is sounding a bit “dirty”…I’m being serious. Take your minds out of the gutter (for now).
The first thing to do is figure out exactly what it is that makes you feel happy. If you don’t know, then maybe take some time to really think about it. Other people can’t make you happy. Look to a purpose rather than to a person for fulfillment. Happiness comes from within. Happiness is not something that you can get in life. Happiness is something that you bring to life.
Until next week…Thank you for letting me share my first blog.
Great blog Karin!!! Can’t wait to read more